Hardship is not an exception; it is a universal part of the human experience. Everyone’s going to have their time of trials and tribulations and troubles in this world. This isn’t just a modern psychological insight, it’s an ancient piece of wisdom. The Word of God acknowledges the inevitability of relational friction. Apostle Paul tells us that in relationships, there’s going to be trouble in the flesh (Philippians 7:28), so expect it.
Since trouble is a given, the only variable we truly control is our response. The central message is not to simply endure these challenges, but to actively abound in your relationship regardless of the circumstances. This directive holds true whether you are full or hungry or sad or happy. Abounding is a conscious, powerful choice to thrive amidst guaranteed imperfection, a world apart from merely enduring, tolerating, or surviving. It means choosing to invest, to love, to connect, and to grow together not in spite of the difficulties, but through them.
The journey to a strong partnership, then, requires a fundamental shift in perspective away from the fragile pursuit of a perfect, storm-free existence and toward the robust, collaborative practice of navigating any tide together. The ultimate aim is to abound, to flourish with intention, no matter the circumstance, choosing a bumpy, meaningful reality over a boring, sterile ideal. This reframing leaves us with a final, vital question: What could change if we stopped asking our relationships to be perfect and started asking them to be real?
God bless, Shirah Chante, your relationship coach
PS+ Watch Resilience in Relationships for more detail.
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